I know all of you are probably pretty stressed right now, what with relatives coming, gifts to be bought and delivered, and meals to be cooked. So, I thought I’d try to lighten the mood and share a couple of humorous moments I’ve experienced during this hectic holiday time.
The first one is about “The Santa that Nobody Wanted”.
We have this yard decoration in the shape of Santa in his sleigh, with blinky lights that outline it. We’ve had it for quite some time, and this year decided to retire him. He still worked and everything and I didn’t want to throw him away, so I took him to the resale shop.
You’d have thought I was carrying the plague. When the resale lady saw him, she started shaking her head, her eyes wide, backed up a few steps and said, “No … no … no … we don’t want him … no we have no use for that.”
I felt a little bad for my Santa but was determined to find him a good home. I really wasn’t in it for the money, so I drove to a local charity’s resale shop to donate him. Surely he would help their cause by selling for a couple of dollars.
The volunteer there took one look at him and also began to shake her head. I looked down at my Santa to see what horrible thing they were seeing that I was not, and couldn’t find a thing. The lady was quickly ushering me to the door before I could put Santa down.
When I got back home, Santa still in my trunk, I noticed that the trash had not yet been picked up at my curbside. I felt horrible, but placed Santa on the heap.
Later that day when I went to retrieve the empty trash cans, there was Santa, propped gingerly against them. Even the garbage men didn’t want him.
I couldn’t sell him, couldn’t give him away, and couldn’t throw him away. So my son put him in the middle of the street, hoping somebody would just take him. Somebody found him all right, but put him back up in our yard.
We still have Santa. Next year I’m gonna try to give him to one of my college kids. I’ll let you know if it works.
My next story is about “The Trying-to-Buy-What’s-Popular Phenomenon”. I was at a toy store once many years ago right after they had put out a new shipment of Cabbage Patch Kids. Cabbage Patch dolls were so popular then that women would literally fight each other over them.
I just happened to be in the right place at the right time. My daughter had been wanting one, but I hadn’t been able to get my hands on one anywhere. I picked one out, and news of the shipment spread. Women and men from all over the store rushed to see what the commotion was all about.
Even people who didn’t have a little girl bought a couple just because everybody else was.
Well, last week my husband and I were given the task of buying three dozen hams for his office. We took two shopping carts to the ham section of the store and found the ones we wanted. He began to pass them to me as I counted them.
Just like the Cabbage Patch Kids, the news spread. Soon there were people crowding all around, trying to grab one for themselves. They thought that there must be something really special about these hams, and it’s better to be safe than sorry. One lady put three in her basket, another was urging her husband to ask the store personnel if there were more hams in the back.
We finished counting out our three dozen, and starting laughing as soon as we were out of earshot. We looked back at the cooler, and there was still quite a commotion around the hams.
I wonder if any of them would like a Santa?
