When a woman and a man are driving along and the woman says, “I’m hungry,” what exactly does that mean?
The unsuspecting guy, especially if he’s young, doesn’t always catch the subtleties of the sentence “I’m hungry,” so his response is usually something like, “Oh, you are?”
He is then caught completely off-guard because the woman gets huffy and he can’t figure out what he’s done wrong.
Men … for future reference, “I’m hungry” means, “I saw a restaurant back there and it got me to thinking about the chicken I had last time I was there, and you need to guess what I’m thinking and which restaurant it was and let’s go there, okay?”
When men say, “I’m hungry,” it means “I’m hungry.”
Yes, the art of communicating with the opposite sex is not easily understood, because what is said and what is meant are rarely the same. Mindreading takes years of practice and still you don’t always get it right … just ask your folks.
The same couple is at home and the man says, “Honey, come in here … you’ve just gotta see this great jump shot!”. The wise woman will know he really means, “I’m watching a basketball game, so please oh please don’t ask me to come in there and help wash dishes.” He really doesn’t care if you see the jump shot or not.
If the woman says, “Honey, come in here … you’ve just gotta see this!” it means “Honey, come in here … you’ve just gotta see this!”
But men, beware if your woman ever says, “We need new curtains.” That means “Suzy just redid her whole house and it’s so pretty and I want to redo ours, too, so we also need new carpet and new furniture.” And if she catches you while you’re watching the game and you just nod and say “That’s fine, honey,” well, you’re in for a big surprise because she probably already has the wallpaper picked out.
Also watch out for “This kitchen is so inconvenient.” When she starts complaining about her kitchen, it means “I want a new house”. Better to not watch any games if she’s complaining about the kitchen.
If a man says, “We need new curtains,” take his temperature. Men don’t notice curtains. If he says, “This kitchen is so inconvenient,” commit him. Men also don’t notice if a kitchen is inconvenient, as long as the refrigerator still opens. He also doesn’t care about how pretty Suzy’s house is.
But when a man says, “We need a new television,” it means “Bob got a new television and I want one, too.” Same for “We need a new truck” or “We need a new lawnmower” or “We need a satellite dish.” Bob always gets this great new “manly” stuff and guys are always jealous of him.
If a woman says “We need a new television” it means the old one can’t be fixed. And “We need a new lawnmower” means “Let’s hire someone to do the yard.”
And guys, if your woman ever says, “We need a new truck,” don’t believe it for a minute. That means she’s getting ready to ask for something really big and what she really means is something like, “If I let you buy that new truck, will you take me on that trip to Australia?”
New trucks can be very, very expensive.
