I have to keep telling myself that bunches of things were invented by accident.

But I wonder if any of the inventors ever got close to burning down their houses?  Or ruined their mother’s rug?  You never hear about the mistakes … or the mothers.

My daughter and a friend watched the movie Chocolat a couple of weeks ago.  If any of you have watched it, you know that by the end of it, you would kill for a piece of chocolate. 

In the movie, the lady puts chili powder in one recipe and says it really adds some zip to it.  You can see where this is going.

After the movie, the girls wanted chocolate.  They got into my kitchen and made the biggest mess you’ve ever seen, inventing their own special concoction of chocolate surprise.  They made me taste it.  Yes, it had chili powder in it, as well as cinnamon and a couple of other things I couldn’t identify.  All I can say is they need to keep going to school because they’re not going to get rich making chocolate.

A couple of days later, these same two girls decided, unbeknownst to me, that they could make some really cool candles with the almost-used-up ones we had. 

What a disaster.

First, they pulled out one of my (good) pans and melted the wax in it.  As they stirred the goop with my (good) spoon, it splashed out all over my (good) stove.  They rested the spoon on my (good) spoon rest.  By now wax was everywhere.

Then they selected a pretty glass (a good one) to pour the wax into.  When they did, they discovered that different glassware is tempered for different temperatures.  This particular glass was not tempered for boiling wax, and needless to say, and it broke.  Wax spilled all over the (good) counter.

Undeterred, they retrieved one of the previously-used-thicker-votive-jar-things.  They poured the wax into it and were elated when it didn’t break.

Next, they put some string down into the wax, and to make sure it would light, they poured some lighter fluid (the kind you put on charcoal) into the jar.

Well, they are still alive, or I couldn’t tell this story, but it was not a pretty sight.

I was just getting out of the shower when I heard screams coming from the kitchen.  My daughter screams a lot … when someone tickles her … when a hot guy comes on television … when she sees a bug … so I really didn’t panic at first.

More screams.  I threw on my robe and ran to the kitchen.

Apparently, they had tried to light their little invention and the flare-up that followed nearly caught their hair on fire.  Luckily, they backed away from the flame before it exploded, sending glass and wax everywhere. 

If anything good can be said, I guess it’s that the kitchen didn’t burn down.  They threw water on the fire pretty quickly.  And they learned about lighter fluid.  It seems everybody has to learn the hard way about lighter fluid.

The girls worked for a good hour cleaning up the glass and scraping wax.  Wax on the counters, wax on the floors, and wax on the rug in front of the sink.  The rug has little tassel thingies on each end and the wax was even embedded in the tassels. 

I’m still finding bits of wax on the stove and counters.  I can’t get the wax out of the pan, and the tassels will never quite be the same.

I have to wonder what kind of stories the mothers of Madame Curie and Albert Einstein could tell about their kids.  I try to take comfort in the fact that there were probably some real doozies

Meanwhile, my daughter is banned from the kitchen.