When my daughter was in eighth grade and we first experienced the “Eighth Grade Dance”, I thought the whole idea of having junior high kids go to the equivalent of a prom was sort of ridiculous. A lot of parents agreed.
The reasons from family to family were varied. It’s a lot of money … from evening gowns and tuxedo rentals to flowers and dinner out. Some said it “ruined” the uniqueness of the senior high prom. The kids would have nothing special to look forward to; the prom would be just another dressy affair.
Well, my son went to the Eighth Grade Dance last week, and my daughter went to prom last year. I have totally changed my mind. A complete 180.
Let me just compare the two so you can get a glimpse of why.
The Eighth Grade Dance began at 8:00 p.m. I’d say 98% of the kids were there by then. The prom started at 9:00. The only ones there were the ones who helped decorate. The remainder straggled in, some as late at 11:00 p.m. If they stayed even one hour, that was considered a lot.
There is a town close to here that has a Grand March at 9:00 p.m. sharp. They introduce each senior and junior, along with their dates, and they parade around the dance hall for everyone else to see. Moms, dads, grandparents and siblings all come to witness the display of gorgeous gowns, beautiful young women, and handsome young men.
That would at least get them there on time. And I’d really like to see all those kids cleaned up at one time. But from what I gather, after the parents leave, the kids don’t stay long there either.
The difference is that eighth graders are EXCITED about the dance and don’t want to miss a minute of it. Of course, they can’t drive, so they really don’t have a choice. Which is another reason I like the Eighth Grade Dance.
The high schoolers could really care less about the dance … they show up only so they can have their picture taken, and so they can tell their parents they went. Talk about a big waste of money, planning, and hard work!
The eighth graders actually dance. The high schoolers are simply marking time. They’re already thinking about the after-parties.
My son was so excited about wearing a tuxedo, he tried it on as soon as we got home with it and modeled it for everybody. The high school guys are old enough, and they’ve worn a suit enough times, where they really don’t like dressing up anymore. All the paraphernalia that goes with a tux is just extra baggage to them. But renting a tux for an eighth grader is money well spent.
The junior high girls all get their hair done, and for most of them, it is the first time to REALLY dress up like Cinderella. This is like the game “dress-up” they have played their whole lives, except this time it’s for real. They all feel like princesses. And they all look like princesses, too.
The parents all stare with gaping mouths … it is the first glimpse we have that our little girls are becoming women. It’s both exciting and scary.
The high school girls also get their hair done, but this time it is more crucial that it is the P-E-R-F-E-C-T ‘do. They still like to dress up, only this time they are concerned with sexy vs. fluffy, having the perfect shoes, and whether their tan lines show. It’s just not as magical.
The junior high kids don’t want the evening to end because then they’ll have to take off their fairy-tale clothes.
The older kids pack jeans and change as soon as they leave the dance, assuming of course that they ever made it to the dance at all.
I think we’d be smart if we started a new trend: “The Promless Prom Night”. Let them get all gussied up, go out to eat, have pictures taken, and go to an all-night party. Skip the dance, decorations, and DJ. They’d have just as much fun and we’d all save a lot of time and money.
Spend it on the eighth graders. They’ll appreciate it a lot more.
