I don’t know what we’re gonna do with these dummies who don’t know the rules for picking kids up from school.
My freshman, of course, is too young to drive, although he’d argue with you about that. Anyway, we’re in a carpool, and my job is to pick up in the afternoons.
As most of you know, our teenagers went to a new high school for the first time this fall. Traffic was snarled in all directions both in the mornings and in the afternoons. Administrators and police met quickly to determine the best solution.
On the second day, there were cops at every corner, lanes blocked, orderly lines, and lots of rules. We’re not used to all these rules … at the old school there were no rules. We came, we bullied our way to the school however we could, we snatched our loved ones, and scooted out of there as fast as we could.
Now there are long lines, but at least they are orderly. We turn in from the highway, then turn right into the student parking lot, then left at the rear of the lot, then left two more times until we have made the whole loop back to where we started. It is a system that all parents must learn or have the wrath of hundreds of students and parents fall upon you.
The very front car waits at a given spot until the beloved bell rings and the hordes descend upon us. When this happens, the front car is then allowed to lead the pack around to the front of the school to pick up his or her charge.
I’m guessing there are about a hundred or so cars all waiting patiently in our serpentine line, twiddling our thumbs. By the second week, we were all professional picker-uppers (PPUs) and scorned any idiots who didn’t know what to do by now.
One lady came in off the highway and attempted to turn LEFT of all things. The nerve. Who does she think she is, turning left when all the rest of us have to turn right!?
Well, the policeman stopped her, by golly. She kept pointing urgently to the front of the school, but he just shook his head and waved her into the line along with the PPUs. Nobody gets special treatment, no sirree.
One man, a novice, came in yesterday and made his way halfway around the parking lot, turned around, went to the front of the line, where he passed up the front car a bit, put the car in reverse and pulled in front.
The same yellow car is always first in line, and I don’t know how early she gets there but sometimes I’m there pretty dern early and she’s already there. I’m thinking she packs a lunch and just camps out all day. Anyway, this novice had just taken her coveted spot. Not a wise move.
He obviously didn’t know the rules. He certainly didn’t know he had just pulled to the front of the line, which is unheard of among PPUs. I thought the throngs were going to string him up alive.
This morning I had to take my son to school because he had to be there early. I took him to the front of the school, but all the doors were locked, so I pulled him around to where the teachers park, thinking there would be an unlocked door there.
I am a PPU, not a PDO (professional dropper-offer), and I didn’t know the rules. Pretty soon a policewoman was stopping me and scolding me for not following the rules. I’m sure all the rest of the PDOs were scowling when I turned left instead of right.
You only make that mistake once. I can now say I am a PPU and a PDO.
