Your child asks you, ten minutes before it’s time to go to school, “Are my white shorts clean?  I need them for practice after school.”  What do you say?

There are several answers to this particular question, depending on if you work outside the home, on how much sleep you got last night, and especially if this child has a habit of waiting until the last minute to ask such questions.

Here are your choices.  The first one is something June Cleaver would say, and they go down from there.  Where do you fall?

“Well, I noticed those shorts were getting a little ragged, so I bought you three new pairs, sweetheart.”

“Why of course, honey.  I always wash all your clothes the minute you take them off and they hit the floor.” 

“If they were in the dirty clothes hamper, they got washed.  If they were on your floor, they didn’t.”

“You’re a lucky kid.  I folded some laundry last night at midnight while everyone else in the world was sleeping, and I think I saw some white shorts.”

“Yes they’re clean.  They just not dry.  And don’t give me that look.”

“Yes, they’re clean, but your dad did the laundry and now they’re pink.  Stop crying … at least they’re clean.”

“Why are you asking me?  Do I look like your own personal servant?!  Do you think I have nothing better to do than make sure all your clothes are clean?”

“I don’t know if they’re clean or not.  It depends on if you washed them.”

“Did I know you needed those shorts washed before this morning?  No!  Well, how in the world am I supposed to read your mind?”

“No, I haven’t had time to do laundry in two weeks.  Nothing is clean.”

“I quit doing the laundry here a month ago just to see if anyone else would do it.  Apparently not.”

“I didn’t know you owned any white shorts.”

And finally:

“Do I even know you?”